These two, on the surface, seem to be kissing cousins. Not true. One has an essence of bad trouble and that makes it far different from the other. Long ago, nearly a decade, I picked this thought up in one of my strange classrooms and as it was not that important to me then I filed it for future reference. Events of the past 18 months or so have caused me to pull that file. There I was, minding my own business ….. then I got involved with two people, it turns out I had one of each personality. On the surface they seemed very similar, same age group, same education and even physically resembled one another. But, oh, so different. From observation and then back to my strange classroom this is what I concluded.
My complicated person is comparable to .. hell, nothing I have ever met before. She is problematic, convoluted, difficult and inconsistent. She lies to others as much as she does to herself. She wants her bread buttered on both sides, then does not like the word “consequences”. She indulges in self-serving behavior and blames it on a compulsive nature. When she is getting what she wants she is sweetness and light, when not tearful and depressed. She will leave her boyfriend, only to return to him tearfully later, and the whole mess starts again. Walking with her was like navigating an unmapped minefield, with the enemy lurking in the nearby bush.
My complex person is like a user-friendly computer program. She consistent, straightforward and while having an intellect sharper than my Gerber, often her comments on this blog belied her age, and she kept me on my toes. But she lacks experience in this hard thing called life. She has no hidden agenda, she knows where she would like to go.
Observations on the 18 month “field training.”
The complicated person brought out the less pleasant side of my personality and I used all my arcane skills to run an almost perfect undercover ops in order to have an illicit love affair with her. Hell, it was exciting and I loved it. (defect of character) It also chewed me a bit and I broke from many months sobriety, and went wandering again. Only to return and repeat the process, until it hurt too much.
The complex person brought out the better side of my personality and was exciting in a much more acceptable way. The better side of my personality forced me to end the relationship though, and I suppose I resent the Christian religion just a little more, but if that is her path who am I to try to divert it?
A compilation of my Strange Classrooms is soon to be released, please “Like” and keep an eye on this page.
Here is a story of developing and breaking an addiction, while dealing with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome at the same time.